Losing my cool... a no-no!

This morning I did something I am not proud of and truly regret.  I was very busy, trying to finish what I was doing for I was short on time.   Then, Ynigo kept on covering what I was reading with his feet and then later on with his hands.  This was because he wanted to play with me.  But I explained to him that I could not as I had to  finish what I was doing.  Instead of obeying however, he went back to covering what I was reading.  I said please again and asked him not to but to my frustration he did not listen.  I started to feel irritated and to make matters worse, he started tapping on what I was reading.  It was then that I lost my cool... I snapped at him and nudged him away forcefully.  


This surprised my dear little boy and he looked at me with great hurt and sadness, like he was going to cry.  I had to look away and tried to calm myself first.  My heart went out to my little boy who was still sitting o  so stunned.  I immediately prayed and asked for God's forgiveness as I was not the woman and mother that He wanted me  to be.  I then looked at Ynigo, lifted him up  and hugged him tight.  I then said I was very sorry for doing what I did and when I said that, tears immediately fell down his cheeks and he sweetly said, "okay".  As soon as he said this, his tears turned into full blown crying which made me cry too.  I then said, "will you forgive me?" and he immediately, in between sobs, said, "yes, mommy".  We then cried a bit more and prayed together.   He even said in his prayer, "Dear Jesus... thank you for (I) forgiving Mommy..."  Oh, I truly pray that the Lord will help  me the best Mom that I could be.  I should not have snapped at Ynigo, I should have not nudged him, I should have controlled my emotions and most importantly I should have made him feel that he was MORE important to me than what I was  reading...


May I learn from this experience and not do this again.  I thank God for  rebuking me and working in me, may he continue to provide me with 'teachable moments' to prune me.  I thank God for my little boy who is always very forgiving.   May he always be this way.